Some days I feel like I'm going non-stop from morning to night. Sustained literally by the grace of God (because let's face it, He's enough anyway, and I'm not drinking coffee currently AND I'm tired from growing this little life!).
And a lot of days that running around from morning to night looks like this: Wake up, pray, get out of bed (somewhat begrudgingly), get breakfast for the littles, fix myself something, start some laundry, wash any leftover dishes, eventually get us all dressed, pick up toys/break up sister disagreements as I go, get myself ready, head out the door if we're going somewhere (after continually urging everyone to find shoes), nap, make dinner while getting the babes to do an activity, encourage cleaning up for Daddy's arrival, get dinner on the table, clean up dinner aftermath, play a little/look up recipes while Daddy plays, get baths, bedtime routine, and then catch up with my man before conking out.
Wash, rinse, repeat.
And honestly, somedays it's hard to feel like I have purpose in it all. It's hard to remember that this IS worth it. That this IS something. That I'm making a difference. Many a good post have been written on this motherhood journey and its validity, and I'm not attempting to be one of those...just simply agreeing. It's grueling work. Tiring and not always rewarding.
But, it's about the little moments.
Today I was struggling with all this (thus the post, obviously) and feeling like all I had been doing all day was correcting, promoting sharing, talking about behavior, and disciplining. I was exhausted by lunchtime. Maybe even shed a tear or two to the hubs on the phone (who is very busy at work currently, and bless him, he was still patient). As a side note, I'm sure pregnancy hormones don't help anything, haha.
So we changed paces and went to the playground. Took lunch. Ate. They got on the swings. I tried to breathe :)
Then we came home and took much-needed naps.
Naptime ended and we played outside again. And Elise, all on her own, picked a little bouquet of purple flowers just for Mommy. "Here Mommy, these are for you!" And just like that, the craziness of the day, the frustration, the weariness, faded away. And I was (mostly) refreshed. I was grateful to be her Mommy in that moment.
Somehow she still loves me. The tired me. The Mommy who needs grace after grace. The one who gets aggravated and isn't always loving. She picks flowers for me. She loves me.
(and I think her sissy does too ;)
It's a pretty sweet deal this mothering thing. It's a challenging, heart-wrenching, soul-finding deal...but it's sweet. And I'm glad to be theirs.
(And some photos from this evening outside...Daddy came home and we were all happy :)
(As a final note, I realize mothering doesn't look the same for everyone...this was just my day, and in my way, I'm sharing the thoughts from that day here :)